One of the joys of creating wedding ceremonies here in France is learning about French Wedding Ceremony customs and traditions. The “Love letter and Wine Box” ceremony is probably the one I see the most.

A pretty wine box which was full of well-wishes from family and friends pic https://amandine-carrique.com/
The Love Letter and Wine Box Ceremony
Is it really five years ago that I wrote about a Love Letter ceremony? Time flies…..But in all honesty, I quoted the love letter ceremony as being Scandinavian, which it probably is. However, in these days of entente cordiale (don’t get political please, this is a wedding blog), many of our “customs” have become adapted to suit our purposes.
I moved to France after writing my original piece, and have regularly included just such a tradition, but this time I call it a “wine box” ceremony. Now, this doesn’t sound especially romantic, but, as ever, it’s “how it feels” on the day that’s important!
Using a wine box to create a French wedding ceremony custom
So, at risk of being accused of cultural misappropriation, let’s consider why I now refer to this little bit of fun as “French”. Truth is, we’re in France!
Let me explain. A love letter ceremony can use any box, you can take a look at what I previously wrote here. But my ceremonies are now all in France and I’ve yet to create a ceremony for a couple who doesn’t enjoy the odd glass of wine. So, let’s include a bottle of wine and tuck it safely away in a pretty box. By the way, I’ve given up trying to get “genuine French” wine boxes! In this case, Etsy or Amazon is your friend and you can have your wine box personally designed to help commemorate your special day.

So many of my weddings are held within vineyards, the Wine Box Ceremony is perfect! pic https://www.charlenepelut.com/
The Love letter and wine box bit!
So, “what actually happens in this ritual?” I hear you ask! It’s looking to the future, creating a bit of a time capsule. Within your wedding ceremony, we’ll have taken the letters you wrote to each other (or, if you prefer, the personal vows you made to each other, or both) and tucked them safely inside the box. What else could go in? If there are guests unable to make it on the day, how about asking them to write a special note to include? Or ask the guests present to write a message to you both. As for the bottle, this ceremony is in France so ideally a bottle of something local- rosé from Provence, a Minervois Muscat, a rich red from the Languedoc? As long as you’re confident it will “lay down” for the time you want, it’s completely up to you!

This box contained notes from guests, as well as vows and a well-wish from me! Pic https://www.amantis-photo-video.com/
Hammer it home!
It’s not entirely “necessary” but I do enjoy having my couples bang some pins/lightweight nails into their boxes! I’ve read elsewhere that using a wax seal is preferable, but since most of my ceremonies are outside, I’d rather not risk the lit candle required for the job! So, a bit of teamwork as you handle a hammer together is fun, and will help you resist opening the box earlier than planned! (On another, less optimistic note, this can also be referred to as a “fight box” to be opened in tricky times to remind you what being married is all about. Hmm, a bit pessimistic, if potentially realistic!)

The lid doesn’t have to be nailed down, a clip is fine!
So, what’s in a name?
Considering all of the above, what shall we call this ceremony? Love letter ceremony? Wine Box Ceremony? Fight Ceremony? French wine box? In the same way that it’s up to you how you interpret the occasion, the name is up to you. Do me a favour though, just don’t call it the “French Letter” Ceremony (and if you don’t understand the reference, please look it up)!
Why have the wine box in your ceremony?
Picture yourself one, or maybe even five years from your wedding day celebrating your anniversary. Among all the other wonderful things you can do to celebrate your day, you’re going to find a quiet moment, open the bottle of wine you put aside and read the messages you wrote for each other, and those from your beloved family and friends. All the emotions you felt on your day will come flooding back as if it only happened yesterday.
Then you can write another note, replace the wine, and do it all again next year!
Santé!

Remember your wedding day with your wine box!
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