Funeral Testimonials

I’m a member of the Institute of Civil Funerals. Sometimes families post testimonials on their website. This is an excerpt from one of them, written by Rose’s son, Stephen. 

Did you feel the celebrant dealt with you in an appropriate manner? Yes

Please provide any details explaining your answer

Sensitive, listening, attentive and nothing too much trouble. Timely and regular contact. Five stars.

Is there anything else you would like to add?

This person is a credit to your Institute. Absolutely professional and caring in everything. Conducted my Mother’s funeral instilling celebration, joy and dignity. Thank you Helen.

I recently received a request for feedback on your role in my Dad’s funeral from the Institute of Civil Funerals, which reminded me that’s it’s time to write and thank you for everything that you did for us. Here you go:

Both my wife and I are qualified and experienced professional psychologists. We know what we’re on about when it comes to people skills. On meeting Helen, we were both impressed by the immediacy with which she established authentic rapport and went on to demonstrate the standard Rogerian qualities of an authentic helping relationship (concreteness, congruence, accurate empathy, warm acceptance verging on unconditional positive regard).
I started the meeting with Helen experiencing it as, albeit important, yet another job of many to be got through, but that shifted quickly. I soon found myself moved and inspired. Thanks in no small part to Helen, my Dad’s funeral was as successful as such events can be but, as I look back, that initial meeting with Helen stands out brightly amongst the positive aspects of the bereavement overall. I suppose I would have found my positive inspiration in some way, because I know how to do that, but Helen made that seem deceptively easy. Helen has the magic. She helped me to look Death in the eye with a steady gaze. As an ordained Buddhist, supposedly capable of dealing bravely and creatively with impermanence, I found Helen’s easy ability to inspire that response in me deeply impressive. I think she’s magnificent.

With much appreciation,

David

I found Helen very easy to talk to, she arrived on time and Conducted herself in a very professional manner, whilst being friendly and sympathetic to our situation. She listened attentively to what we had to say about Robin which was reflected in the draft service she prepared and sent to us by email shortly after our meeting. We all felt that what she had drafted, perfectly captured his personality and our wishes for the service. Helen ensured that we had her contact details and assured us that we could contact her at anytime if we wished to discuss anything further.

Following the service , many people commented on how lovely the service was and how impressed they were with Helen.

From the moment I was put in touch with Helen she was supportive, helpful and prompt.
It was more than just being excellent at every point, her suggestions helped me personalise the memorial for my dad and aided making it a celebration of his life.
It would not have been anywhere nearly as good without her and she was a brilliant support before during and after.

I would highly recommend Helen for any occasion where a celebrant attends; ours would certainly have not been the same without her.
My thanks for this to her truly come from the bottom of my heart.

Helen was sympathetic but not afraid to keep things light and we were able to discuss the service/eulogy by remembering all the good things. Mum was a very private person and Helen had written a beautiful eulogy from the information we had provided that was just about right and was read out at the funeral service with warmth and respect.

My sister has left a review via the website and everyone who attended the service at the funeral home said that it was a lovely funeral and very respectful.

Good morning, Helen.

I wanted to say a huge thank you for yesterday. It was a difficult day in more ways than one but what you did was beautiful and the send off they had will hopefully go someway in healing deep seated wounds.
Their friends will be unaware of many issues and they can go away with their memories of both of them in tact which was important to us. Dad loved Mum very much and that had to be respected.
Every one said what a wonderful service it was and how engaging you were in paying tribute to them.

Hi Helen,

I would like to thank you for speaking at Keith’s funeral today.

The unfortunate circumstances of Keith’s passing and the limited information we knew about his life made it particularly difficult for you to compose an appropriate eulogy. However, I thought you managed to strike the right balance between reflecting his life truly and yet avoiding the negative aspects of his later years. When for all bar those few years Keith had led an unassuming and inoffensive life, it would have been unfair to have dwelt on the changes that unaccountably came over him. In speaking about Keith, your respectful manner combined with the warmth of your delivery was, I am sure, appreciated by all. And considering we knew so little of Keith’s musical taste, the music you chose was quite fortuitous – an inspired guess on your part!

So thank you once more for all your efforts.

Regards,

Hugh

Hi Helen. We wanted to thank you very much for helping to make our difficult day a special one. Many people have said how lovely the service was. We very much appreciate you having been a part of our day. Kindest regards, Ann Thorne, Teresa, Maria and Mollie x

Hi Helen we would like to thank you for the lovely service you done for my dad and being there for us. We had lots of messages last night saying how wonderful the service was. Thanks again, Sarah.

Dear Helen, On behalf of myself and my family may I thank you very much for the way you helped to steer us through a difficult time at Rhian’s funeral on Friday.
Given the many events of Rhian’s life, some of which are on the dark side, I must admit I was quite intrigued as to how you would weave it all together in a celebratory way.
But I needn’t have worried as you conducted a brilliant service, which was clear , concise and befitting of the occasion and all achieved in that narrow time frame that we talked about!
I was personally overwhelmed at the crematorium by the many kind words and tributes paved by Rhian’s friends and associates, and your service certainly reflected Rhian’s life in the way they would remember her best. Does that make sense? It does to me anyway.
Once again, many warm thanks for your sterling efforts, Helen, good luck and good health
Andy Wood

These were sent to me after the funeral of a man who died suddenly whilst on holiday. Sad times, and very difficult for the family. His widow sent me these to show her gratitude.

Dear Helen,

As a family we wanted to say a big thank you for the wonderful and such personal celebration that you led for our Auntie Lynda. You relieved all our apprehension, you were so friendly and professional, it felt like we had known you for years. You captured all the special memories we shared with you so precisely and fondly. We can’t thank you enough for everything you did to make the day a true and wonderful celebration of Lynda’s life. Please keep in touch, and thank you again, with love,
Denise, Mandy & Nicky

Dear Helen
I wanted to thank you for helping us celebrate my Dad’s life last Wednesday. I have been inundated with positive comments from family and friends about how much they enjoyed the tribute to him. When you visited us a few days before it was immediately clear that we had made the perfect choice in which to say goodbye to my father.
Once again many thanks and all the very best for the future.
Gareth and family.

Dear Helen
I just wanted to thank you so much for being the celebrant at my father’s funeral yesterday. I know that Gareth had every confidence in you after you met him last week and it was well-founded. I really wanted to meet you with him but it just could not be.
I so appreciate the thought and effort that you put into the eulogy and the calm and sensitive way that you delivered it. I particularly liked the Dryden that you added in. My father would have been particularly pleased that a woman was the celebrant- he had very clear views about equality too.
Once again, thank you very much
Stewart Jones

A wonderful wonderful celebration of my husbands life. Helen was truly amazing. Talented, efficient, loving, friendly, and so supportive. It made the day so special. I have had letters after letters raving about the day. I cannot recommended her highly enough.

Sincere thanks

Just wanted to reiterate my sincere thanks for your contribution to Friday’s service. It really was everything we could have wished for dad; I’m sure that he would have approved 100% of the content and tone of the service. We received so many compliments on the success of the day and much of that was down to your calming supervision of proceedings and your sensitive and appropriate choice of words. I am certain that for many of the congregation it was the first time to experience a non-religious service, but I am also sure that it will have opened their eyes to an alternative means of saying goodbye to a loved one. I do hope that you get lots more inquiries as a result; I’m sure that your services will be in demand.

Inevitably for all of us in the immediate family, there is a tremendous feeling of relief as well as a tangible sense of closure at getting to the end of the funeral service. However, the net result was not just relief, but also great satisfaction and happiness in the knowledge that we had fulfilled dad’s wishes so completely (with the exception of the cardboard box, that is). All that I can say is, thank you so much for all your help in making that happen.

Sincere thanks

Dear Helen,

I just wanted to write a short note to thank you for everything you did yesterday and those days before.

I was floundering somewhat before we met at Starbucks and having your experience and calm just helped me to focus on the task and send Kathy away in celebration of her life, not mourning at her death.

Dear Helen, I found myself thinking about you just now as we are about to head to Wales this weekend to scatter the ashes of my brother-in-law, Geraint Thomas, at whose funeral you officiated on July 26 in Llanelli. I have been meaning to write for an age to say thank you for the amazing job you did and how lovely it was meeting you.

Helen has been part of one of the most special days of our lives on our daughters naming day and now part of one of the saddest. Helen recently held the service for my Grandmothers funeral and she did so in a very compassionate and caring way. Helen was able to create a service my Grandmother would have been happy with and gave her the final dignity she deserved. We as a family are very grateful for the compassion and support you showed us during that sad time. Thank you xxxx

I am just writing to thank you on behalf of Sarah Lewis and Jessica for conducting the service of their Mother and Grandmother. Although a small service you made it dignified and warm. I think it must be harder performing your duties to a small group than a large group.

Sarah and Family were very happy with the service and went with her Mothers wishes. Once again thank you for your kindness.

I never got chance to thank you for conducting the ceremony for Simon. It was very well thought of by friends, family and myself. Many people were able to watch the funeral online and we’re glad that they could do so. My daughter in Houston and Simon’s former colleagues were very grateful for the opportunity and everyone said how lovely and appropriate it was. Robert’s anecdotes were very precious.

I have no doubt that my mum would have enjoyed meeting you and been pleased that you as a woman had conducted her funeral service. All the family are grateful for the gentle grace, dignity and insight that your presence brought to the day. God Bless you and Thank you.

Thank you again for all your hard work, patience, understanding and kindness that you displayed throughout your time with all my family. You were a pillar of strength and inspiration at a time when I felt that all I had in the world was gone. I felt we ‘jelled’ straightaway. It was your ability to relate to my emotional state and allow me to express myself orally and in writing. You then took my words and put them in a way that I hadn’t thought of but surprised me because it was much more akin to what I felt. You conveyed the exact essence of my departed loved one.

Your organisational and public-speaking skills were acutely apparent. You conducted the service with the utmost dignity and sensitivity. I am still getting compliments about the funeral being the nicest, most intimate and personal funeral that people have experienced. I would just like to thank you again for what was a service that far exceeded my expectations. From the start when my family and I were in the depths of sorrow after just losing our dad you lightened our day by allowing us to share our memories with you. The strange bit was it felt so natural and easy to share those memories with you, it almost felt like sharing them with a relative….not someone I had just meet for the first time.

On behalf of my mum and family, I should like to thank you for all of your support , guidance, and assistance in the arrangement and officiating of my father’s funeral. We were made to feel very much at ease during our initial meeting with yourself and were very glad that you took the time to discuss not only my father and the funeral process but my family history and the small details that tend to humanise what would otherwise normally be quite a difficult time.