Evening is falling over the loved up James and Mace

You’ve chosen a gorgeous château nestled in the rolling countryside of Occitanie, in the historic region of Gascony, in south west France. Friends relax in the sun-soaked gardens, of the Chateau de Puissentut, glasses in hand. You and your fiancé are finally ready in cool linen suits as the heat of the day retreats into a warm, honeyed light. Nearby, the old pigeonnier — where you will soon exchange vows — waits patiently.

The stage is set for Mace and James’ Golden Hour wedding

The stage is set. The music begins.

The wonderful Antony Holloway played the boys in and out of their ceremony

This was the scene for the wedding of James and Mace, who travelled to Château de Puissentut to formalise their commitment to one another. They invited a small but beautifully formed group of friends, all of whom had journeyed from the USA or further afield, to witness their ceremony.

Mace and James in their ceremony

A Destination Wedding in Occitanie

James and Mace wanted their ceremony to tell their story — not only their love for one another, but also the deep bonds they share with their family and friends.

During our pre-ceremony conversations, we hatched a plan to invite loved ones to contribute directly to the ceremony. Six friends and family members were asked to share their thoughts and feelings about the love-match that is James and Mace.

Smiles and laughter as a guest tells her story

As ever, I had no idea how I was going to weave these voices together until I sat down to write. The speakers represented a cross-section of old friends, newer friends, and family. The result was a rich, layered ceremony — a telling of James and Mace’s journey, interspersed with heartfelt reflections on friendship, belonging, and the joy of welcoming new partners into long-standing relationships.

Love shone between the speakers and the grooms

A Ring Blessing Filled With Love

James and Mace chose to highlight the importance of everyone present by including a ring blessing ritual.

During this beautiful moment, the wedding rings were passed from hand to hand. Each guest held them close, silently offering a blessing — whether from the heart, from faith, or simply from love. By the time the rings returned, they were imbued with the collective goodwill of everyone gathered there.

It’s a simple ritual, but one that never fails to add depth and meaning to the exchange of rings.

Contemplation as friends bless the wedding rings

Personal, Playful Wedding Vows

The pinnacle of any wedding ceremony is the exchange of vows. Many couples write their own; others prefer familiar, traditional promises. James and Mace chose something a little different.

I asked them, secretly, to write down three reasons why they love one another. During the ceremony, they promised to continue doing the very things their partner cherished most.

With their permission, here’s a real example.

James wrote that he loves Mace because:
“No matter how weird I get, you’re right there being weird with me.”

So I asked:

“Mace, do you promise to keep being weird with James — unapologetically, wonderfully weird?”

His “I do” landed perfectly.

Laughter even during the vows

Their final vow was a playful variation on the traditional:

“Do you promise to love James/Mace, comfort him, celebrate and support him — whether the skies are glittering or grey, whether your pockets are jingling or just full of fluff — in sickness, in health, and in all the magical messes in between?”

It worked a treat.

A Ceremony Full of Heart (and Cheese and Wine)

After a few words about the future James and Mace hope to build together — and a moment of silliness involving cheese and wine (you really had to be there!) — the ceremony drew to a close.

One final surprise remained: a message from Mace’s parents, read aloud by his brother, telling him how proud they are of the man he has become. There were few dry eyes.

Applause as the setting sun shines on James and Mace’s first kiss

Then came the first kiss (surely it’s time we found a less antiquated phrase for such a joyful moment!) and the joyful exit of the grooms, showered with confetti and goodwill.

Leaving the pigeonnier in a shower of confetti

Celebrations at Château de Puissentut

The wonderful hosts, Angela and Dirk, were already busy preparing for the celebrations to follow. I lingered for a while, chatting with guests, admiring the champagne tower pour, and enjoying the spectacularly good apéros.

A champagne tower – a great French tradition!

It was another unforgettable wedding ceremony at Château de Puissentut, filled with warmth, laughter, and love.

Thank you to James and Mace for inviting me into their day, and to their family and friends for giving their time and hearts so generously.

A beautiful evening followed in the Chateau de Puissenut garden

Thank you to Darek Smietana for the wonderful pictures

To Antony Holloway for his excellent playing (and flexibility!)

And to Angela and Dirk at Chateau de Puissentut for making everyone so relaxed before I’d even started!

The post Whimsical Golden Hour Wedding at Château de Puissentut, Occitanie appeared first on Treasured Ceremonies.

We need to show our support

It’s about time I put myself out there and shouted that yes, I AM happy to create your ceremony no matter who you are. I always have been, and have had many happy days creating ceremonies for same-gender couples. (All women as it happens, I’ve no idea why.) Basically “Love is love” is our LGBTQIA+ policy. But for reasons I’ll explain, it’s taken until now to give myself permission to publicise this fully.

I haven’t felt the need to write about my support of the LGBTQIA+ community. I hadn’t, until now, placed rainbow flags on my website. I’ve always lived in very rural places (West Wales now France) as a celebrant. There’s been no opportunity to attend “alternative” wedding fairs or have a wide circle of gay friends to vouch for my allyship (is that a word?). I’ve had gay friends of course, but this was simply part of everyday life. No big deal.

Something’s changed.

But something that’s happened within my family has (slowly) made me realise how privileged I am as a cis white hetero woman. I haven’t had to think too hard about what it means to have a “safe space”. Let alone what it means to actually provide one. (I need to note here, in fact it isn’t always easy to be “safe” as a woman, but that’s another topic).

But even I, in my “ivory tower” in Southern France have realised that the time has come to identify as an outspoken ally. What has helped me realise this?

Introducing Alex

My older child Alex is non-binary.

Alex 2025

The world is sometimes not an easy place for them to live in.

Last Summer, Alex took a step forward with surgery and the use of testosterone in hormone replacement therapy. (They’ve permitted me to share this information). Since this time (and before then) I’ve had to make changes in the way I talk about my youngsters. When asked, I say I have two children. Until recently this would be tagged with “one of each”. Now gender can stay irrelevant. Which, I now realise, it is but it’s a social norm to ask and/or tell! And people do ask. And that leads to a conversation about the meaning of the word “non-binary” or in French “non-binaire”.

LGBTQIA+ quandary

When talking about my children, I do my best to make the topic what absolute stars they are (of course!) It would be easy to simply refer to Alex in their previous gender. Why would I do that? To not have to explain yet again what “non-binary” means, and have the pleasure of simply describing what a strong, clever, beautiful person they are! Alex is unlikely to ever meet the person I’m talking to, what harm could it do? But, being true to Alex is being true to myself, so yes, I do use “iel” in French and of course “they /them” in English.

Explaining the pronouns!

One person at a time, to explain the use of they/them/iel/iels

My French isn’t bad, but I still need years more practice! However, I surprise myself with my ability to explain the use of the “iel” pronoun. But explaining “non-binaire” goes beyond the use of pronouns.  I find myself suggesting that even if we can’t empathise with the need to make such drastic changes to our bodies (lucky us) it’s not affecting us, so it’s for us to simply accept those who do feel the need.

And that applies to everyone in the LGBTQIA+ rainbow. Accept, support, be an ally.

For a guide to gender identity terms, take a look here

For the use of pronouns in French, Lawless French has it covered!

LGBTQIA+ Weddings and funerals

My “acceptance” has never been a question. I’ve conducted weddings for all-girl couples. In fact, I got on so well with one couple that they invited me to stay on for the after-wedding barn-dance! I sat at a table of their gay friends (they all met through a dance retreat). One of the guys told me that, despite the fact he’d recently attended a great many weddings in London none was as touching, engaging and personal as mine! (If you scroll down you can find Lise and Harriet’s own comments in my testimonials!)

Lise and Harriet’s relaxed wedding day

I remember a funeral for a gay man in Llanelli which was a flamboyant affair with brightly coloured flowers and plentiful rainbow references.

What does it mean to “Support” the LGBTQIA+ Community?

The Transgender flag

So why haven’t I promoted that I’ll work with everyone, no matter where they are on the LGBTQIA+ spectrum until now? The main way of showing support would be to place flags or badges on my website/social media pages. This seems to be the accepted norm in my wedding community. But I felt queasy doing this since it felt like virtue signalling. Like saying I support a charity without ever actually doing anything for them. Somehow, I didn’t feel I’d earned the support of this community, so why should I have the right to fly their flag?

I now see that “support” IS speaking out. It’s showing visibly that not only am I happy to create ceremonies for everyone, I am also in a position to actively show my support of everyone.

The Progress flag

On a personal level, I will continue to explain to one person at a time why we need to accept. How we can change our language to do so.

On a bigger stage, I will not stand by whilst individuals and governments legislate against whole rafts of our society. I will call out the keyboard warriors who mean harm to our society.

I will fly your flags. I hope you’ll allow me to share them as your ally.

The traditional Gay Pride flag

Ps … The good people at “Cyberghost” have asked me to share a link to their blog giving practical advice “for LGBTQ+ folks who’ve had to delete photos, change numbers, or vanish for their own safety”. Yes, there are other VPNs out there, but this article gives some good advice!

The post Flying the Flags, Our LGBTQIA+ Policy of “Love is Love” appeared first on Treasured Ceremonies.

Suypriya, Philipp and their family and friends

When I first met Supriya and Philipp, I expected to be diving deep into research to design a richly traditional dual‑cultural wedding ceremony in Provence, France. And while Supriya and her family’s stunning Indian attire certainly set the tone, the ceremony itself felt wonderfully familiar — warm, humorous, heartfelt, and full of connection, which is always the lifeblood of my ceremonies.

Supriya and Philipp’s families come from Malaysia and Germany, and they chose to weave their cultural traditions across their entire wedding weekend. The day before the wedding included the exchange of garlands and other meaningful rituals (sadly, I wasn’t present to witness every detail!), while the ceremony itself focused on what mattered most: honouring their love for one another — and doing so in one of the most beautiful wedding locations in Provence.

A Provence Wedding at Domaine le Clos d’Hullias

Their wedding weekend took place at Domaine le Clos d’Hullias, located in the beautiful Rhone Valley. This exceptional wedding venue feels like a small hamlet of ancient stone houses, lovingly restored with cool Provençal décor. Lavender scents the terraces, and the panoramic views over the surrounding hills are simply breathtaking.

Domaine Le Clos D’Hullias

Their wedding weekend was at Domaine le Clos D’Hullias in Saint-Christol de Rodières, Provence. It’s a beautiful domaine which feels like a hamlet of ancient stone houses. They’re artfully refurbished with cool Provençal inspired décor inside and the scent of lavender across the terraces. And the views are stunning!

The wedding village at Domaine le Clos d’Hullias.

Supriya and Philipp chose to hold their ceremony beneath a tree in the garden. The florists transformed the shady arbour into a magical scene, with floating white gauze and blossom‑filled baubles gently moving in the breeze. While not everyone was completely sheltered from the Provençal sunshine, guests were free to move into the shade — and the children, in particular, were very happy to do so!

The children were happy to sit in the shade!

The Bridal Party and Indian Wedding Attire

I always love reflecting on what my brides wear during their ceremony, and Supriya was no exception. She and her wedding party looked absolutely stunning. Supriya and her daughter, Layla, wore traditional Indian lenghas, while Supriya’s mother opted for a Punjabi suit. Layla, dressed in white, walked ahead of her mum down the aisle — the picture of daughterly innocence.

Layla walks ahead of her mum

Supriya herself wore a beautifully embroidered peach gown, shimmering with silver sequins. Her arms were adorned with gold and peach bangles reaching halfway to her elbow, and she wore an elaborate headdress with a delicately embroidered veil that flowed to the floor. Gold jewellery, lightened with clear stones, completed the look.

Zack escorts his mum down the aisle

Supriya was escorted down the aisle by her son, Zack, who — like Philipp — wore a peach buttonhole to echo the bridal flowers and dress. The men also wore jaunty Panama hats, much appreciated under the strong afternoon sun.

A Meaningful Dual‑Cultural Wedding Ceremony

So what made this a truly dual‑cultural wedding ceremony? The Indian bridal outfits gave the celebration a distinctive cultural feel, while other traditional elements were reserved for the days leading up to the wedding. During the ceremony itself, German culture was represented through readings delivered in German by Philipp’s mum and a close friend.

The leaflet listing the readers and readings was extensive

In total, there were six readings, allowing children, parents, and friends to take an active role — something Supriya and Philipp felt strongly about. It created a ceremony that was inclusive, personal, and deeply moving.

A Wedding Quiz (Yes — Really!)

Including a fun quiz within a wedding ceremony is becoming increasingly popular, and Supriya and Philipp embraced the idea wholeheartedly. Before the wedding, I spoke with family members and friends, gathering snippets of information — some touching, some cheeky — to weave into the script.

After the vows, the quiz revealed surprise anecdotes, with Supriya and Philipp competing to recognise themselves in the stories shared. It was relaxed, joyful, and had everyone laughing — a perfect reflection of their personalities.

Supriya and Philipp enjoying their wedding quiz

Wine Box Ceremony in Provence

French culture made an appearance towards the end of the ceremony with a wine box ritual. Supriya and Philipp sealed their vows inside a beautifully decorated wine box, along with a bottle of wine to enjoy on a future anniversary. Guests also added written wishes, which the couple will read as they toast each other on their first wedding anniversary — a wonderful way to extend the meaning of the ceremony beyond the day itself.

Supriya and Philipp’s pretty wine box

The Vows

Personal Wedding Vows

Supriya and Philipp chose to write their own vows. While not everyone feels confident doing this, Philipp — despite some initial doubts — expressed himself beautifully on the day. Both reflected on the two years they had already shared together before making heartfelt promises for the future. It was honest, emotional, and truly lovely.

Supriya appreciating the vows Philipp gave her.

After the Ceremony: A German Wedding Tradition

Following tradition, Supriya and Philipp sealed their ceremony with a very public kiss before making their exit through a shower of confetti. One final dual‑cultural moment followed: a German tradition involving cutting out a large heart printed on fabric using nail scissors — no easy task!

Philipp (I believe!) won the race, before carrying Supriya through the heart without a single unlucky stumble, as tradition dictates.

Philipp fulfilling a German wedding tradition!

A Perfect End to a Provence Wedding Day

My role in this wonderful wedding weekend ended with time to admire the stunning views from the domaine and to appreciate the care and professionalism of the entire supplier team. From the beautiful floral designs to the delicious food provided by the traiteur, and the DJ who supported the ceremony flawlessly, it was a joy to be part of such a positive and heartfelt celebration.

If you’re planning a destination wedding in Provence or elsewhere in France and would like to explore how your ceremony can reflect your story, culture, and values, I’d love to hear from you.

👉 Please click here to read feedback from happy couples, including Supriya and Philipp. 👉 Get in touch to chat about your French wedding plans.

An intimate evening moment beneath the fairy lights in Provence.

With thanks to

Venue Domaine du Clos d’Hullias,

Music https://www.britishdjinfrance.com/ 

Photographer https://amandine-carrique.com/

The post A Dual-Cultural Wedding in Provence, France appeared first on Treasured Ceremonies.

A pretty wine box which was full of well-wishes from family and friends pic https://amandine-carrique.com/

The Love Letter and Wine Box Ceremony

Is it really five years ago that I wrote about a Love Letter ceremony? Time flies…..But in all honesty, I quoted the love letter ceremony as being Scandinavian, which it probably is. However, in these days of entente cordiale (don’t get political please, this is a wedding blog), many of our “customs” have become adapted to suit our purposes.

I moved to France after writing my original piece, and have regularly included just such a tradition, but this time I call it a “wine box” ceremony. Now, this doesn’t sound especially romantic, but, as ever, it’s “how it feels” on the day that’s important!

Using a wine box to create a French wedding ceremony custom

So, at risk of being accused of cultural misappropriation, let’s consider why I now refer to this little bit of fun as “French”. Truth is, we’re in France!

Let me explain. A love letter ceremony can use any box, you can take a look at what I previously wrote here. But my ceremonies are now all in France and I’ve yet to create a ceremony for a couple who doesn’t enjoy the odd glass of wine. So, let’s include a bottle of wine and tuck it safely away in a pretty box. By the way, I’ve given up trying to get “genuine French” wine boxes! In this case, Etsy or Amazon is your friend and you can have your wine box personally designed to help commemorate your special day.

So many of my weddings are held within vineyards, the Wine Box Ceremony is perfect! pic https://www.charlenepelut.com/

The Love letter and wine box bit!

So, “what actually happens in this ritual?” I hear you ask! It’s looking to the future, creating a bit of a time capsule. Within your wedding ceremony, we’ll have taken the letters you wrote to each other (or, if you prefer, the personal vows you made to each other, or both) and tucked them safely inside the box. What else could go in? If there are guests unable to make it on the day, how about asking them to write a special note to include? Or ask the guests present to write a message to you both. As for the bottle, this ceremony is in France so ideally a bottle of something local- rosé from Provence, a Minervois Muscat, a rich red from the Languedoc? As long as you’re confident it will “lay down” for the time you want, it’s completely up to you!

This box contained notes from guests, as well as vows and a well-wish from me! Pic https://www.amantis-photo-video.com/

Hammer it home!

It’s not entirely “necessary” but I do enjoy having my couples bang some pins/lightweight nails into their boxes! I’ve read elsewhere that using a wax seal is preferable, but since most of my ceremonies are outside, I’d rather not risk the lit candle required for the job! So, a bit of teamwork as you handle a hammer together is fun, and will help you resist opening the box earlier than planned! (On another, less optimistic note, this can also be referred to as a “fight box” to be opened in tricky times to remind you what being married is all about. Hmm, a bit pessimistic, if potentially realistic!)

The lid doesn’t have to be nailed down, a clip is fine!

So, what’s in a name?

Considering all of the above, what shall we call this ceremony? Love letter ceremony? Wine Box Ceremony? Fight Ceremony? French wine box? In the same way that it’s up to you how you interpret the occasion, the name is up to you. Do me a favour though, just don’t call it the “French Letter” Ceremony (and if you don’t understand the reference, please look it up)!

Why have the wine box in your ceremony?

Picture yourself one, or maybe even five years from your wedding day celebrating your anniversary. Among all the other wonderful things you can do to celebrate your day, you’re going to find a quiet moment, open the bottle of wine you put aside and read the messages you wrote for each other, and those from your beloved family and friends. All the emotions you felt on your day will come flooding back as if it only happened yesterday.

Then you can write another note, replace the wine, and do it all again next year!

Santé!

Remember your wedding day with your wine box!

The post A « French » Wedding Ceremony Custom appeared first on Treasured Ceremonies.

Pippa and Dan exuding love and joy on their day

      Pippa and Dan’s request for their wedding in Domaine de Blanche Fleur, Provence, was for it to be a “fun, semi-traditional wedding ceremony that is relaxed and low-key.” And Domaine de Blanche Fleur was the perfect setting. This isn’t a grand chateau wedding since Blanche Fleur is, indeed, a “Domaine.” In fact it’s more like an absolutely beautiful hamlet which has been lovingly brought back to life from its past as a paper mill and abbey.

Blanche Fleur is full of secret places, and of course white flowers.

So, why were Dan and Pippa so keen on a “fun relaxed ceremony” at Blanche Fleur? Well, they’re certainly a fun couple, and wanted their friends and family to have a stress-free weekend and enjoy the ceremony. Partly also because they had decided to make their private vows to each other, well, privately! So I got there in plenty of time to be with them for this special moment.

A Relaxed Blanche Fleur Celebrant!

It wasn’t a problem since Blanchefleur has seven beautiful apartments accommodating up to thirty guests. I was immediately made at home in the “mothers’” room with a cuppa and a snack.

Having time for a cuppa before changing into my ceremony clothes was a luxury!

The First Look by the old mill at Domaine de Blanche Fleur

When the moment came for the vows, Thomas the photographer came to find me since he’s worked at Blanche Fleur before and knew the perfect spot. And so it was that I joined Pippa and Dan as they took their “first look,” which in itself was simply gorgeous!

The excitement builds as Pippa and Dan prepare for their first look

The Private Vows

Then, after a brief “settling down” introduction from me, Pippa and Dan stood in dappled shade under the baking Provence sun and poured their hearts out to each other

The secret vows were so romantic

Dan and Pippa’s personal vows were perfect. They reflected on their time together so far, what they meant to each other and their thoughts for the future. And of course, they exchanged their own promises. The love shining in their eyes as they drank in each other’s words was unmistakable.

The Wedding Ceremony in Domaine de Blanche Fleur

And so the time came for the ceremony. Blanche Fleur has various stunning settings for their wedding ceremonies. Pippa and Dan chose the beautiful tree-filled garden, with the bridal party making their entrance down a splendid staircase.

Pippa’s elegant entrance with her brother

Greeting the Mums!

The wedding ceremony was full of love from the word go since Pippa and Dan had asked me to include a show of gratitude for their mothers. So once Pippa, escorted by her brother, had reached the ceremony space, I called the ladies forward where their children gave them a hug.

The Mums exchange a hug and a giggle at the start of the ceremony.

Friends also featured strongly in this ceremony! People had travelled from the UK, USA, Denmark, New Zealand and Australia, so I ensured they knew how much Dan and Pippa appreciated the efforts they’d gone to come all that way to Provence.

Pippa and Dan’s Story

In the months before the ceremony, I’d spoken to some of Pippa and Dan’s Besties. Their stories gave me wonderful material to illustrate this gorgeous couples’ early days together and even shed a little light on who they were before they met. They met, in fact in New York, which is where they live and where Dan popped the question. What a wonderful story of friendship to romance in the times of Covid under the gaze of the Statue of Liberty!

All were entranced by the love story

The Hand-tying Ceremony

But of course, a wedding ceremony, no matter how much fun we have in telling stories and illustrating a couples’ love, is all about the vows. Pippa and Dan had already made their private vows, so we included a simple hand-tying ceremony which we borrowed from the traditional Celtic hand-fasting ritual to symbolise the gravitas of their traditional vows.

Pulse-to-pulse

The colours of the ribbons had particular meaning for Pippa and Dan. Their hands remained together pulse-to-pulse as they repeated their traditional promises after me. Then their friend read “All I know about love” by Neil Gaiman. We removed the ribbons to replace them with wedding rings, and this pinnacle of the ceremony was over.

Confetti and Close!

I endeavour to ensure that, since everyone has focussed on the sheer romance of the wedding vows and exchange of rings, we raise the energy ready for the ensuing party. This day was no different and there was plenty to be positive about. Pippa and Dan had shared their hopes for the future with me which proved to be moving but also entertaining. Then there was a bit of fun which invcluded a couple of dreadful puns from Pippa involving brie cheese (you had to be there!).

Sharing Pippa’s puns!

The “big kiss” finale was particularly special since Dan’s second name is – would you believe? – “French” so I could introduce these super people as Mr and Mrs French!

Pippa and dan make their exit

And so marked the end of another utterly joyful ceremony. I cheered along with everybody else as Pippa and Dan walked their way down their olive-leaf confetti aisle.

What would the vibe be within your wedding ceremony?

Thoughtful moments within the laughter

Every ceremony is unique. There are always moments of reflection within the fun and laughter. Some are more formal than others, and I can do that too if that’s your thing! But I want my bride and groom to be relaxed at their wedding  – in Provence or anywhere else – so the experience is joyfully unforgettable. If you’d like to learn more about having me with you for your wedding ceremony in France, jump to my wedding pages then get in touch!

Pippa and Dan kiss after their ceremony

With thanks to all my fellow suppliers; Photographer: Thomas Bertini Photography. www.thomasbertini.com

Location: @blanchefleur.provence, Florist: @anosamours_designvegetal, Hairstylist/makeup artist: @charlenedolomaquilleuse, DJ: @wildfire_djs, Band: @orangetriomusic, Caterer: @maison_nans, Dress: @tbdress.fashion, Costume: @suitsupply

The post A Relaxed Domaine de Blanche Fleur Provence Wedding appeared first on Treasured Ceremonies.

The thing about setting off on a new life in a new country (albeit with the “old” man) is, well it’s kind of time-consuming! So when, for the first time in my two years in France I thought “I’d better write a wedding blog”, the title that came to mind was simply “Reflecting on a 2023 wedding””. But then, you knew that since you’ve read this far. But what to write about. What do I choose from the last 2 years’ weddings in this beautiful country?

Chris and Louise take a moment to reflect on their day Summer 2023, provence.

It’s the last day of 2023. I’ve got so many memories swimming around I’m struggling to know where to start on my reflection of this year, let alone 2022 as well. “Fun and laughter and joy ever after…” is part of Sir Cliff’s take on Christmas (that’ll be Cliff Richard to you younger people, the song’s Mistletoe and Wine, he played with the Shadows….ok, look him up!)

Anyway, I couldn’t help humming the tune whilst looking at some of my 2023 ceremony pictures. Nothing to do with Christmas, but a lot to do with the vibe at the best weddings. So for now, I’ve decided to blog about one in particular, inspired by the pictures taken by the wonderful Colas at My Blue Sky Wedding.

Chris, the groom awaiting his bride

It’s all about the Vibe

Why this wedding? I could have chosen pretty much any of them, but what struck me about Chris and Louise’s pictures was that in every shot everyone looked utterly engaged with the ceremony. We had no symbolism other than the exchange of wedding rings. There was a chamber orchestra and four people read three readings since one was in both French and English.

One of my favourite moments occurred before the show had even started! As with nearly all my weddings here in France, meeting Chris and Louise felt like meeting old friends after all those hours creating their ceremony – despite never having met them in person. I’d not only poured over their questionnaires dozens of times and spoken to them length on Zoom, I’d also had great conversations with a selection of their family and friends to help weave the tapestry of their story.

The Start of the Ceremony

Louise’s entrance with her father was perfect. In the photos, you can see the love in the bridesmaid’s faces, and Louise’s dad’s pride as he walked his daughter across the lawns.

I like to take time to help everyone settle into the ceremony here in France in particular. After all, everyone has had to travel to get here whether they’ve come from the UK or further afield. We always have a “stop and breathe” moment, to give everyone a chance to relax and be in the moment.

Taking a moment to realise “we’ve made it!”

What’s next in the Wedding?

After that it’s time to introduce the body of the ceremony. In this case, we focussed in Louise and Chris’s beautiful story which started in France. Since I’d spent time talking to both families and close friends, I was able to engage them from the start, teasing the parents about some of the information they’d shared.

I love it when guests participate through readings chosen by the couple or by themselves. In this case, Louise and Chris’s friend Laura read “The Relationship Promise” by Luke Wright. It was an apt reading to start the lead up to their exchange of promises!

Two other readings included “Love is Sharing” skillfully translated by Louise and read in both English and French, and the final poem was “Here’s to Right Now” written by Ms Moem and read by the indomitable Dia, Chris’s grandmother.

As the ceremony progressed, we had smiles,

Laughter such as discussing Chris and Louise’s particular foibles (“I love you despite…”!)

Thought provoking moments,

And hilarity brought on by Chris’s grandmother Dia telling him off for claiming not to be as “cultured” as his beloved! As you can see by those around her, her off the cuff comment went down a storm. Everyone shared the moment as I conveyed what she said to those at the back.

At last, the Wedding Vows

Then came the vows, and they were beautifully written and read by our bride and groom. The joy these two conveyed in finally tying the knot was palpable!

The charm of this ceremony came from Chris and Louise’s story rather than extra symbolism. Though I couldn’t resist sharing Louise’s sens of triumph when she finally wore Chris’s ring!

And so to the final moments when we shared wishes for the future and heard Dia’s reading. “The first kiss” crowned all as we celebrated the love these two have for each other.

Now Enjoy the Rest of the Day!

And so for Louise and Chris and their guests to canapés, dinner and partying for the rest of the day and into the night.

This was one of a number of weddings I’ve had the privilege to celebrate in Provence. I still have to pinch myself to check I’m not dreaming at times. “I’m an English Speaking celebrant in France”! I’ve travelled to Provence, The Herault (where I live), The Aude, The Tarn and even further north into Dordogne. I can’t believe how lucky I am to have been able to bring the profession that I love over the channel with me to France, and to continue starting great wedding days with engaging, as-near-to-perfect-as-possible (!) ceremonies.

As for Louise and Chris, they were very kind with their response to the ceremony.

In an email they wrote;

“Thank you again for your beautiful ceremony! It was so perfect, and we’ve had lots of friends and family commenting that the ceremony was really special because it was so personal. People also really enjoyed the loving despite and loving because section haha”.

And later, “Helen did a brilliant job of officiating at our wedding in Provence and we can’t recommend her highly enough!! She is warm and funny, and a delight to work with in the months ahead. On the day itself we laughed, cried and learnt some new things along the way, it was a beautiful ceremony.”

Which will do for me!

The pictures were taken by My Blue Sky Wedding, 

Venue Mas des Comptes de Provence

Flowers Bujar MORINAJ c/o Mas des Comptes de Provence

Musicians Elegy Quatuor

Videographer (though I’ve not seen the video!) Alexandre Vallee

The post Reflecting on a 2023 Wedding in Provence appeared first on Treasured Ceremonies.

Aneesha has written this post giving three top tips for finding your ideal wedding venue in the South of France.  You’ll find Aneesha, planner extraordinaire, at Lace & Lavande.

You’re engaged! Yay! Félicitations!

And so it begins 😉…

Now, there’s a pretty good chance that one of the questions at the top of your list is – “Where are we getting married?” Let’s assume you’ve decided to go the destination-wedding route (Yay you!). And you would like to have sunny weather, fantastic food and wine, history, romance… some je ne sais quoi? “Well then!” says this author nonchalantly, whilst daintily sipping (gulping) a glass of (previously-mentioned fantastic) wine, “How about the south of France?” Ok then, France it is! Now, maybe you’ve mastered “Bonjour”, “Au revoir” and “Voulez-vous couchez avec moi ce soir”? Fabulous, well done! If that’s as far as it goes however, to preserve your sanity, hiring a wedding planner might be in order. Make this step one before taking further steps in planning your wedding in the south of France… However, if you’re fluent in French, you could get away with searching for a venue from your home country.

First Kiss with the backdrop of Chateau la Durantie. Photographer Ross Holkham Photography

Tip numéro 01: Prioritize vendors in your budget

Every couple has a unique vision of how they would like their wedding experience to unfold. Therefore, the top 5 vendors on the vendor list tend to differ. So far, in our experience, the venue and the caterer tend to take the top 2 positions on the list. These two also tend to be the most expensive vendors (Quelle surprise!). So once you prioritize your vendors,  making money-related decisions will be a little easier moving forward. Venues in the French Riviera and Provence can quickly go for over 15,000€ for a weekend in the high season ( May to September). So, if that region isn’t your top priority, then perhaps you could move your attention to nearby areas, like Occitanie, for example. You will have sun-kissed skies, delicious food, and wine, along with a lot more choices in venues better-suited to your budget.

Chateau de Canet is a family run venue which you hire for three days of family celebrations in the Aude, Occitanie

Tip numéro 02: When (and for how long) do you have access to the venue

Ensure you have time to get things perfect. Château de Varenne, Sauveterre. Photo credit Claire Macintyre

You’ve now selected a couple of venues that are within the budget limit you had set. What should you look out for next? It’s important to know when you’re allowed full access to the venue as most venues host other events besides weddings. Let’s assume your wedding is slated to be celebrated on a Saturday. However, you don’t have access to the venue on Friday because a seminar is taking place. If you don’t have access to your venue the day before, you could have a problem. This is because you’ll be far more chilled knowing décor (excluding flowers), ceremony chairs etc are ready the day before the wedding. If this is an issue, but you’re still absolutely in love with the venue, you could always ask the venue manager if they could ensure that you have at least half a day before the wedding for set-up. It never hurts to ask 😊! It’s also important to know for how long you will be allowed full access to the venue. Say you’re planning on having brunch the day after your wedding, it would help to know whether that day is included in the price.

Tip numéro 03: Ask about « Droit de bouchon » a.k.a Corkage fee

Tables ready for a french feast at Mas des Comptes de Provence. Photograph Littlewing Photos

Watch out for this one! It could make a nasty hole in your pocket if you aren’t careful. « Droit de bouchon »  (or corkage) is the fee you pay the venue or caterer if you want to serve alcohol other than theirs. This is usually done to recoup revenue lost by the clients not purchasing wine from the venue/caterer. Many venues would request that you buy at least one colour of wine (red/white/rosé) from their wine-list. In return, they would impose no corkage fee. So there you go, folks! Some tips to keep in mind whilst looking for that gorgeous venue in which to say “I do” 😊! I’ll be back with some more tips to help you on your quest to find the ideal wedding venue in the south of France.

Cheers from Provence! photograph my blue sky wedding

Many thanks to Aneesha for creating this blog for us! If you’d like to talk over a wedding in France with me, just jump to my contact page, it’s good to talk!

The post Three Tips to Find Your Ideal Wedding Venue in the South of France appeared first on Treasured Ceremonies.

A simple setting of stones, torches and a few silk flowers.

The good people at “Around Tenby” asked me to write a blog for them about getting married in their beautiful seaside town. Of course, I happily obliged! You can read the article “Get Wed in Tenby” by clicking here. I’m going to tell you here about the Tenby beach wedding pictured in the article. This wasn’t actually a handfasting but I’m using the term “Tying the knot in Tenby” as the other metaphorical meaning of “Tying the knot” – to get married.

“My” Tenby Beach Wedding

As you will read in the article, there are any number of places to marry in Tenby, and ways of doing it. But one of my favourites was held in September 2020. Yes, really, we snuck one in before the second lockdown and it was BLISS! You’ll see a photo from it in the article, but more are on show here.

Katie and Neil had been together for a good few years before deciding they finally wanted to make it official and get wed. As you can see from the photos, one of their sons is an adult and the other is pretty much nearly there. They felt the need to have something simple but meaningful with just close family present.

Why Tenby?

Because they’ve got so many happy memories there of family holidays. They rent an apartment there most years and simply love the place. They also liked the thought of marrying on a beach so all that remained was to decide which beach!

How did we organise it?

Well, to be honest, having written the script, I just showed up where and when I was asked. They decided to hold their ceremony right up the end of the mile long south beach. This can be reached from Penally Station carpark and is far less busy than the other end which is close to the town. We held the ceremony around 6.0 pm to ensure there were even fewer people around. Neil and the boys were the first to arrive. They were armed simply with a chair and some cane torches, a few ribbons and silk flowers and a candle or two. Perfect.

The family gather to cheer Katie and Neil in their beautifully simple surroundings

Setting the Scene

The boys set things up under Neil’s instruction and we all gathered stones to create a heart shape for them to stand in. The flowers were attached to the torches, and a simple aisle created leading to the stone heart ceremony area.

The Arrival of the Bride

Katie and her Mum and Gran appeared from behind the dunes at the allotted time (well, more or less!) and the photographer’s pictures show her enjoying her walk through the dunes to reach us. She looked so happy.

I’ve no idea where she got her ballerina skirt and top, but she looked absolutely perfect! Relaxed, happy and cool in the baking September sunshine.

The Ceremony

They didn’t want any particular symbolism, but everyone did get to bless the wedding rings. I was particularly touched by the reaction of their sons. The younger son had been a bit fed up with being dragged all this way in formal clothes in the heat. Once the ceremony started he changed, and I wanted to cheer when I noticed his eyes closing in concentration as he clasped his parents’ wedding rings!

Younger son takes the wedding rings under his grandparents’ proud gaze.

We spoke of their twenty years together, the strength of their partnership and the love for their family.

We acknowledged the beauty of our surroundings and its significance in the context of their marriage.

There was twenty years of being a couple to celebrate here

Treasured Memories.

After the ceremony there were photographs taken, but not too many, so we all wandered back to the cars together. The family to go and celebrate in their apartment, me to wend my way home. There may not have been a crowd present to celebrate with this family. But I’m confident that we created a memory that will stay with each one of them as a very precious day in their family’s history. Job done.

Neil and Katie take the first “Official” kiss!

Contact me to Tie the Knot!

If you’re interested in tying the knot in Tenby, jump to my contact page and drop me a line.

Photographs, with many thanks, courtesy of the lovely https://www.angharadthomasphotography.co.uk/ Also, many thanks to Katie and Neil for giving me permission to share the joy of their day!

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Congratulations, You’re engaged! https://unsplash.com/@inlieuandinview

1.      How Much Does a wedding celebrant Cost in the UK?

Well, it obviously depends on the celebrant! The beauty of us is that we’re all different, and we’re celebrants for different reasons. Some, like me, do this as our main source of income so we have to charge accordingly.

Having said that, if I was doing this to prop up a pension, I’d work just as hard on the ceremonies, so would charge just the same.

All I can tell you is what I cost, and, to an extent, why.

The best thing to do is to contact me and tell me what you want, and we can take it from there. I’ve blogged about this question alone though, so if you want to know more, this article “How Much Does a wedding celebrant cost” should help!

2.      What is a Wedding Celebrant?

Me! I am! Ok, that’s facetious, I’ll be serious for a minute.

This is me! Admiring a bee on a dandelion. As you do.

A celebrant is a person who creates and officiates (or performs if you prefer) your wedding ceremony. They will often create other ceremonies as well such as vow renewal, naming and funeral ceremonies. There’s more to read on this on my “weddings” page on my website.

3.      What should you look for in a wedding celebrant?

Have a look at their website. Do you like how it’s written? Does the celebrant’s personality and style come across from their writing? Or from the pictures of their ceremonies? Remember a good ceremony is beautifully written. The writing must reflect you as a couple, your personalities, your “vibe”. So, a good celebrant is truly empathetic, and reflects this in the way your ceremony is written and presented.

But don’t simply choose your celebrant simply from a website, cost or even recommendation! They have to “get” you, and you them, in order to create the right ceremony for you. So, ensure you have a chat with your celebrant online or face-to-face before booking them.

I stayed on for the ceilidh after Harriet and Lise’s wedding. Fair to say we became pals in the wedding process!

Check that they’ve trained with a recognised association as well. I trained with Civil ceremonies; I wouldn’t want to entrust my ceremony to someone who was “winging it”! Which takes me to question number 4;

4.      Can anyone be a celebrant?

That’s a good question, the simple answer being “yes”! In theory you don’t even need to train to be one. You can ask a friend to conduct your ceremony if you wish to. However, I’ll never forget the wedding which I was asked to create just two weeks before the big day. The friend who’d said he’d do it hadn’t even started to think about what he was going to do!

However, just as any other professional in any other business, I’d like to think that being a celebrant takes more than training. You could be the best writer in the world but have a voice that would put the worst insomniac to sleep. Or have presentation skills that could win you a BAFTA but the imagination of a brick. There are an awful lot of training bodies out there, with an increasingly large number of celebrants appearing on the scene. It takes us back to the importance of meeting your celebrant before booking to ensure you’ve got the right person with the right skills.

5.      What is a Humanist Celebrant?

Simply a celebrant who belongs to the Humanism Movement. This means that they would almost certainly steer clear of religion, and may want to avoid some superstitions and traditions.  Most celebrants (including Treasured Ceremonies’ celebrants) in the UK are independent celebrants. This means we will shape the ceremony entirely around the beliefs and values of whoever we’re working with.

6.      Is a celebrant wedding legal?

Well, it’s not illegal! No, in England and Wales (and France for that matter!) you have to have your marriage made a legal contract by the registrar (or mayor in France). Most couples who use a celebrant do this in a simple, private ceremony a day or two before their celebrant-led  “wedding day” with their friends and family. If you’re having a religious ceremony, it may be legalised by the member of the clergy officiating, dependant on the religion.

7.      Will a Celebrant create a ceremony for anyone?

I will, yes! This is a whole separate blog/statement which I’ve yet to write but have certainly bought into. My website may not be full of images from across our fabulous rainbow society, but that’s probably because I try not to use stock photos and I live in a place which is something of a “Mono-culture”! I’ve tried to rectify this within this blog!

8.   Will my Celebrant Wedding Ceremony be unique?

Yes, certainly if you choose a celebrant who guarantees bespoke scripts. I’ve written here about two very different ceremonies which I officiated.

That’s it! I hope yours was among the eight wedding celebrant questions, and I’ve answered it. Please contact me here if I haven’t, and contact me if I have and you want to talk further!

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I wonder whether your first question to a florist, or a wedding dress boutique, or even a venue is “what do you cost”? So, perhaps “what does a wedding celebrant cost” isn’t the right opening question for a celebrant! Perhaps, “what can you do to make my day perfect?” is the better question. Once you’ve established you’ve found the right celebrant, ask them what they cost!

“HOW MUCH???”

Believe me, that phrase “How much?” has worked both ways for me. I’ll never forget the wonderful lady who booked me for a renewal of vows ceremony. I told her my price having discussed her ceremony with her. She promptly refused to pay it, adding that she’d be paying £250.00 more than I asked for! She runs her own business and values time and experience!

Plenty of other couples book me at my asking price without batting an eyelid. But then there are those who will simply look at the price and say, “for 30-40 minutes work?”, “HOW MUCH?!”

But, I’m proud of how I work and know I give value, so click here if you want to know, but please keep reading to understand what’s behind the price!

What we do

So, what are you paying for when you book your celebrant? I’ve decided to make this personal; this is how I see my “value”.

Starting with the visible stuff;

Meet and sign up

• After your initial enquiry we’ll meet online. There’s no limit on the time the meeting takes, and we often bounce around ideas for your ceremony even at this early stage.
• Once you’re signed up for a Treasured Ceremonies wedding I will keep in touch to a greater or lesser extent, depending on your needs. Well before the wedding I’ll send you questionnaires to start to delve deeper into “who you are” and follow this up with an in-depth chat.

Our “in depth” wedding chat helps me nail who “you” are!

No templates

• You will not be offered any sort of template. Within our meeting(s) we will run ideas for your ceremony past you, such as different types of symbolism (or none at all!) As an experienced celebrant, I would much rather make suggestions based on what I’ve learned about you than simply present you with a list of what’s available.
• I research, plan and create your ceremony. I have never written a book. But from listening to authors speak, I know that the book rarely “just flows”. There are first drafts and re-writes. Believe me, this is often how it is with my ceremonies! So, the fee covers the fact that I may not get it right first time, but this is because I want it to be perfect for you!
• I’ll coach you through writing your own vows if you’d like me to but will write them on your behalf if you insist!
• I’ve got a huge “armoury” of readings at my disposal to suggest, and I’ll even give you a pdf of over 100 readings if you’d like it. My couples are delighted to receive this if they’ve been stuck for ideas. It often acts as a bouncing off point to look further.

The following video illustrates (I hope!) the lack of template and personalisation of a wedding ceremony!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nOB7QVzUe4o&t=168s

On the day

• Look, I’m a pro! I’m confident that I can hold your ceremony space for you, and you will feel relaxed and happy with me leading proceedings on the day. You don’t need to spend the extra money, but if you want a rehearsal, you can have one!
• I present your ceremony. My “life skills” bring the confidence I need to make the ceremony exceptional.
• You’re the stars of the show, but I can’t help being “front and centre” as well! I will be dressed appropriately, by which I mean considering your vibe when I choose my outfit, whilst at the same time being “me”! I really, really don’t go online for a cheap selection of outfits to take me through the season. Neither do I expect you to fund a designer wardrobe! I head for the small boutiques and buy quality in the sales at reduced prices!
• If we need a PA system (for an outdoor ceremony for instance) I’ll provide it.
• If there are other suppliers to co-ordinate with, I’m on it.

The stuff you don’t see (AKA the boring bits!)

All the above concerns your day directly. But what about what goes on behind the scenes? OK, a quick overview of what it takes;

• You’ll be pleased to hear I’m professionally insured against accidents at your wedding!
• How did you find me? I pay for membership of professional directories and of course for my own website. Don’t forget “time is money” and it takes time to keep these digital spaces up to date.
• I keep myself updated professionally. Do you want your celebrant to have learned everything they know several years ago and then rest on their laurels thereafter? It’s important for me to know the current trends within the industry so I keep myself educated!
• Which reminds me, I’m professionally trained, having trained with “Civil Ceremonies”.
• The previous three points are “Business costs”. This is a business. I’m a full-time celebrant. I pay tax and National Insurance. I maintain a car. If wedding celebrants are unable to charge a price reflecting all of the above, our lovely couples won’t get the ceremonies they’re looking for. The ceremonies you deserve.

So, when you contact me and lead with the question, “How Much?”, please don’t be surprised when I answer with a counter question asking when we can talk. Because you must prioritise getting the right celebrant over the cost of your celebrant. Then you’ll get the ceremony of your dreams, and the most memorable wedding day possible!

Please click here if you’d like to know more about how we at Treasured Ceremonies can help make your day perfect (I promise, it’s a bargain!)

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